The one hundred and second puppy in the title of this film is a pure white dalmatian named Oddball that is often as much a CGI effect as it is a puppy. The living, panting puppy is cute, of course but the CGI effect is pretty bad, usually. This all makes us wonder if were watching real dogs at other times in the film or if the puppies are actually simply interesting flights of fancy concocted by myopic computer nerds, the kind of guys you wouldn't let near your 5 year old on any normal day.

"102 Dalmatians," the sequel to the popular live action take by Disney on it's 1960's cartoon, is a rather dismal pointless affair that, like "Home Alone 2" simply reiterates the plot points and thematic elements of the original. Here Cruella Devil, played with lip-licking delight by Glenn Close, is rehabilitated by a Doctor Pavlov who brainwashes her into loving dogs. But get this: In a joke that only 30 year olds would get, Pavlov's method does not work. When Cruella hears a bell, she snaps back to her old dog snatching self. Get it? Pavlov... dogs... bells... Sigh.

Along for the ride on this lame adventure is Gerard Depardieu who looks like he has eaten at least 101 dogs recently. Puffed up like a souffle, we expect the drab Frenchman to burp up fur at any second. He is lost here as La Pelt, a French furrier who apparently hates animals so much he agrees to help Cruella. As one-dimensional villains go, La Pelt is nowhere near as interesting or as ba-a-a-a-d as Cruella. He is pointless here. Couldn't they have found someone a bit more juicy for the role? Allow Johnny Rotten/Lydon to play La Pelt and you'd have a villain to hiss about. Depardieu just seems to hiss all on his own, like a tire going flat.

Lost also is any romantic interest in the film as Jeff Daniels and Joely Richardson are replaced by the tepid Alice Evans and Ioan Gruffudd. Apparently Evans' Chloe has adopted some of the pets to allow a new single female to have a new batch of puppies and a new run-in with Cruella. Surprise, surprise, Chloe also happens to be Cruella's parole officer. Wow! What luck! Adding further confusion to the fact that this "sequel" does not explain it's connection fully to the first film is the replacement of Hugh Laurie and Mark Williams with a lackluster bumbling sidekick for Cruella that adds absolutely nothing here.

One scene that does work is a homage to "Lady and the Tramp" where Evans and Gruffudd share spaghetti while their "kids," i.e. their dogs, watch the Disney cartoon on a video. It's as much a promotional plug as homage but it is still sweet and effective. The same can't be said for the lackluster and downright inane usage of Eric Idle to voice a parrot who thinks he's a dog. Didn't we already see something like this in a film called "Paulie?" Nothing, not a damn thing, about this film is original.

Made for kids, "102 Dalmatians" only has jokes that older adults will understand. I actually laughed about three times here. But the plot is so ridiculous and so pointless as to become drivel. The kids will have to resign themselves to enjoying the cute doggies and the Nickelodeon-esque slimy slapstick of the film's ending, one that seems as improbable as a sequel called "103 Dalmatians" ever being made.

Note:

Directed by Kevin Lima who previously only helmed animated films for Disney. Lima was born in 1962, one year after the original animated film was made. Original story based on a novel by Dodie Smith.

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