SXSW
2002 - Day 5 - Tuesday March 12, 2002
Tuesday is Hell Day at work because I haven’t heard
from J.K. and I am still obsessing on it and, of course,
my boss is at the jobsite and it is a crazy day. Finally
he calls at 11:30am and tells me he got drunk and passed
out and he’s sorry he didn’t call. I’m all about to
forgive him when he launches into this 10 minute story
about his Ex. It’s all too much for me and I tell him
I’m upset with him. This is silly because I certainly
am not mad at him for having fun on his birthday, getting
drunk and passing out. I forgive anyone almost anything
they do when drunk. But really I am mad at myself for
getting so worked up about it all. To make matters worse
the phone call pretty much ends with J.K. saying, after
telling him I’m upset, “Well, why don’t you call me
when you want to talk to me.” This pretty much ruined
the rest of the day at work.
I began to realize that things with J.K. have really
escalated because we have had some pretty special “alone
time” together recently and I find myself falling in
desperate “like” with him. Plus, since it is his birthday,
I have tried to do really romantic things, like bring
him flowers and stuff. I’ve allowed myself to get my
feelings in an uproar over him and when it seemed like
he slighted me, I allowed myself to let it hurt my feelings
when, in fact, the guy did nothing wrong. I know I want
to be with J.K. more then he wants to be with me. That
I understand and accept. I just have to try and not
get so worked up over him. I can't fall too deeply for
him because that’s not where we are right now.
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The phone rings and I hope it’s J.K., but it’s
Mark Brauner. He is going to edit an episode of
Lube TV that we shot last week and he needs this
Ween video that we’re going to show. We make plans
for him to pick it up at my apartment after work,
but of course, he is way late. By this time, I
have put on a bunch of make-up and headed to The
Hideout for “OT: Our Town.” I look pretty good
with black lipstick, I think. Yes, I know I’m
alone on this. I feel like Steven Trask in “Hedwig”
though. Mark and I decide to hook up at Access
studios later that night.
The screening was prefaced by a new (to me anyway)
SXSW trailer. In this one, the main guy and the
puppet are shooting a shot-for-shot remake of
“The Shining’ at the Burger Hut. It wasn’t really
that funny.
Filmmaker Scott Hamilton Kennedy has crafted
a really interesting and compelling film with
“OT: Our Town.” He’s also a nice guy who loved
talking to the audience about his film. He was
a very honest and open person and even told us
that he actually found his subject (and her school)
because he is dating her.
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Scott
Hamilton Kennedy
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I left the Hideout, went home and got the Ween tape
and went to Access to find Mark. When I did, we talked
about the J.K. situation. I told the story to about
10 people that day. Yes, I know I’m a bit obsessive
sometimes.
I was going to the Millenium Youth Entertainment Complex
(hereafter referred to as MYEC to keep my typing fingers
from chapping) to see “The Search for John Gissing.”
I didn’t know exactly where it was, but I knew it was
in the same (bad) neighborhood (hood being the key syllable
here) as the Access Studios. I drove around for 12 minutes
or so and after I was just about to give up, I found
it. It’s pretty easy to spot once you find it.
The place is pretty cool and large for a city owned
facility in the ghetto. (I am saying it like that to
punctuate how many Austinites feel. Most people consider
anything on the East side as being in the ghetto). It
has a skating rink, an indoor playground, a bowling
alley, an arcade, a food court, and a 154-seat theater.
They actually added some folding chairs in the aisles
to seat some stragglers. This is surely a fire code
violation. They better cut that out. It’s also cold
as fuck in the MYEC. Apparently the one thing the city
can’t afford is heat.
After the film, I realized I wanted to see some other
shows at MYEC, so I decide that I’d better pay attention
to the path back to my house so I could return later.
I looked at the first street name I came to and it was
Rosewood. Rosewood? Access is on Rosewood. I turn the
corner and realize I am TWO BLOCKS from Access. What
a dumbass. I drove 12 minutes looking for a place that
was TWO BLOCKS from where I started.
Since it was early and I saw that Mark’s car was still
in the Access studio parking lot, I decided to stop
and see how the edit was going. Mark was almost done.
The monitor showed the shot from our taping session
that had me, Mark, filmmaker Mike Stodard, Melissa and
J.K. This is the first time J.K. has been on an episode.
The minute I saw his beautiful face glowing on that
TV monitor, I knew I had to call him. I was wrong to
make such a big deal out of everything. This boy is
the most gorgeous, wonderful, sweet young man I’ve ever
been with. I refuse to waste time being upset about
things.
I called him and he was at his friend’s house watching
“The Laramie Project.” He asked me if he should call
me when he got home and I said, of course: “Sure, I
mean, of course, if you want to.”
Mark and I went to Denny’s for a quick bite. An attractive
young man named Elliot waited on us. He was very nice
and did an excellent job. There were many teenagers
there and some were playing a crane game. They really
got into it and squealed with excitement while they
or a friend tried to pry a stuffed animal out of the
machine. The glorious delight of youth was infectious.
The minute I got home, I couldn’t wait for J.K. to call.
He did. We talked a bit and it was great. He still seems
to change the subject whenever I start talking about
how I feel. But it was like there was no problem between
us. It was good.
Lodger @ SXSW2002
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